Lyrics Section 4

[bohemian_mark]

MARK
And so into the abyss...The lot. Where a small stage is
partially set up.

JOANNE
[playing with some wires]
"Line in"...
I went to Harvard for this?

MARK
Close on Mark's nose dive.

JOANNE
"Line out"...

MARK
Will he get out of here alive...?

[JOANNE notices MARK approaching.]

JOANNE
Mark?

MARK
Hi.

JOANNE
I told her not to call you

MARK
That's Maureen
But can I help since I'm here

JOANNE
I hired an engineer ...

MARK
Great!
Well, nice to have met you

JOANNE
Wait!
She's three hours late
The samples won't delay
But the cable --

MARK
There's another way
Say something -- anything

JOANNE (into the mike)
Test -- one, two three --

MARK
Anything but that

JOANNE
This is weird

MARK
It's weird

JOANNE
Very weird

MARK
Fuckin' weird

JOANNE
I'm so mad
That I don't know what to do
Fighting with microphones
Freezing down to my bones
And to top it all off
I'm with you

MARK
Feel like going insane?
Got a fire in your brain?
And you're thinking of drinking gasoline?

JOANNE
As a matter of fact --

MARK
Honey, I know this act
It's called the 'Tango Maureen'
The Tango Maureen
It's a dark, dizzy merry-go-round
As she keeps you dangling

JOANNE
You're wrong

MARK
Your heart she is mangling

JOANNE
It's different with me

MARK
And you toss and you turn
'Cause her cold eyes can burn
Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound

JOANNE
I think I know what you mean

BOTH
The Tango Maureen

MARK
Has she ever pouted her lips
And called you 'Pookie'

JOANNE
Never

MARK
Have you ever doubted a kiss or two?

JOANNE
This is spooky
Did you swoon when she walked through the door?

MARK
Every time -- so be cautious

JOANNE
Did she moon over other boys --?

MARK
More than moon --

JOANNE
I'm getting nauseous
[They begin to dance, with MARK leading.]

MARK
Where'd you learn to tango?

JOANNE
With the French Ambassador's daughter in her dorm
room at Miss Porter's. And you?

MARK
With Nanette Himmelfarb. The Rabbi's daughter at the
Scarsdale Jewish Community Center.

[They switch, and JOANNE leads.]
It's hard to do this backwards.

JOANNE
You should try it in heels!
She cheated

MARK
She cheated

JOANNE
Maureen cheated

MARK
Fuckin' cheated

JOANNE
I'm defeated
I should give up right now

MARK
Gotta look on the bright side
With all of your might

JOANNE
I'd fall for her still anyhow

BOTH
When you're dancing her dance
You don't stand a chance
Her grip of romance
Make you fall

MARK
So you think, 'Might as well'

JOANNE
"Dance a tango to hell"

BOTH
'At least I'll have tangoed at all'
The Tango Maureen
Gotta dance till your diva is through
You pretend to believe her
Cause in the end -- you can't leave her
But the end it will come
Still you have to play dumb
Till you're glum and you bum
And turn blue

MARK
Why do we love when she's mean?

JOANNE
And she can be so obscene

MARK
Try the mike

JOANNE
My Maureen (reverb: een, een, een...)

MARK
Patched

JOANNE
Thanks

MARK
You know -- I feel great now!

JOANNE
I feel lousy
[The pay phone rings. MARK hands it to JOANNE.]
Honey, we're... [pause] Pookie?!
You never call me Pookie...
Forget it, we're patched.
[She hangs up, looks at MARK.]

BOTH
The Tango Maureen!

---
[A LARGE COMMUNITY CENTER ROOM. CHAIRS ARE SET UP IN A CIRCLE]

STEVE
Steve.

GORDON
Gordon.

ALI
Ali.

PAM
Pam.

SUE
Sue.

ANGEL
Hi, I'm Angel.

[COLLINS
Tom. Collins.

PAUL
I'm Paul. Let's begin

ALL
There's only us
There's only this ...

[MARK blusters in noisily.]

MARK
Sorry ... Excuse me ... oops

PAUL
And you are?

MARK
Oh -- I'm not --
I'm just here to --
I don't have --
I'm here with --
Um -- Mark
Mark -- I'm Mark
Well -- this is quite an operation

PAUL
Sit down Mark
We'll continue the affirmation

ALL
Forget regret or life is yours to miss

GORDON
Excuse me Paul -- I'm having a problem with this
This credo -- My T-cells are low --
I regret that news, okay?

PAUL
Alright
But Gordon - How do you feel today?

GORDON
What do you mean?

PAUL
How do you feel today?

GORDON
Okay

PAUL
Is that all?

GORDON
Best I've felt all year

PAUL
Then why choose fear?

GORDON
I'm a New Yorker!
Fear's my life!
Look - I find some of what you teach suspect
Because I'm used to relying on intellect
But I try to open up to what I don't know
Because reason says I should have died
Three years ago

ALL
No other road
No other way
No day but today